Gotcha!

What’s the matter? Can’t you see? You’ve been living in make-believe. Or Are you just the one to deceive ‘cause it’s all just a game? First you’re crying, you’re “Heaven blessed!” Then you’re screaming, “Demon possessed!” Can’t decide what you like best, guess it’s all just the same. Who’s inside you now? Amaymon or phanuel? First you found me on my own, said “I gotcha, gotcha, gotcha!” Then you slashed me to the bone, said, “I gotcha, gotcha, gotcha!” Who’s inside you now? Amaymon or Phanuel? What’s the matter, can’t you tell ill intention from meaning well? The road to Heaven or path to hell, guess it’s all just the same. Everything that you took from me, don’t you know it don’t come for free? Maybe you should have let me be, ‘cause you lost your little game. Who’s inside you now? Amaymon or Phanuel? First you found me on my own, said “I gotcha, gotcha, gotcha!” Then you slashed me to the bone, said, “I gotcha, gotcha, gotcha!” And you cut just a little too deep, and I gotcha, gotcha, gotcha! Are you the one that’s losing sleep? ‘Cause I gotcha, gotcha, gotcha! Who’s inside you now? Amaymon or Phanuel?

The Slaughter

I could follow you to open windows, wait there for your signal where I’ll dive, dive in open waters, swim until the slaughter claims me as a daughter. Then I’ll climb, climb until I reach it, sweetest batch of peaches, teachers cannot teach this: I am mine. I’m mine for the taking, confident and shaking, sorry for mistaking this as true. truly what i wanted? Now i’m only haunted, letters corresponded between me, myself and another, long and distant lover, listen to your brother! She is bad, bad news at the doorstep, not what you would expect, make sure that you forget all her words, how her words unfold you. Everything she told you doesn’t have to mold you, you can rise, rise up from the ashes, learning how time passes, slower than molasses. Tick-tock-tick-tick-tick until the timer sounds as a reminder, take off all your blinders, you can see, see what you’ve been missing! Stop the pain of wishing, quit your reminiscing… like when you held my hand on the drive from the sand mountain range… I’ll never go back cause I’m trying to change.

Lazy Susan

I’ve been getting stoned for days, and no one really knows I’m lonely. I’m trying to recall the day when you said that you thought you loved me and how it felt to wake beside you… living in another state of mind... I haven't had a dream in days—Could you even say that I’ve been sleeping? You’re lighting up my darkest days. If I showed you, maybe you’d believe me: I’m dreaming that I’d wake beside you… living in another state of mind… Listening to the record play, it’s spinning like a lazy Susan. The sky has gone from blue to grey.. Is it weird I find the darkness soothing? I’ll cancel all the plans we made… till the needle scratches, then we’ll fade away… I’m wishing that the song we sang reminded me of something different. Like all the freckles on your face, and not the way you needed distance. I’m waiting on the date and time… will you realize that you need me in your life? Oh forever?

Simulation

I got you a thank you card, I’ll send it in the mail. It wasn’t all that hard, I found the stamps for sale, ones with intricate designs all over them, stamps to represent that you are such a gem to me…. so won’t you stick around now. baby please? Kiss me softer now and all over the place. I would prosper from a new love to erase all that hurt when I was only seventeen, all the people who don’t give a shit for me, they’re gone… only when it’s just you and me. Long drives keep me sane and sober and alive. I tried keeping time but found time is a lie. If your cheek pressed to mine is all we can afford, I’ll keep climbing over the seat through your door, we’ll see…. if our love is a secret we should keep. I’ve been living in a trance my whole damn life. I’m tired of living in my convoluted mind. I’ve thought of everything i thought that I could be. wanderlusted after places I could see… I’m sure this simulation’s played out once before… oh, once before...

Virginia is for Lovers!

Not everyone you meet is gonna fall for you, no matter how you treat them or how you follow through—can’t make ‘em stay. I try not to hold like i have to baby, I’ll find what feels better, i’ll let you go. Say, “I’ll wait for you in Virginia.” And I’d go to you, if I could have ya! “Virginia's for lovers!” So, why wouldn't we go? I promised myself that I wouldn’t hold too tight, cause every time i do, i’m just trying to feel right. So I’ll sing a song, top of my lungs, like i am singing for the first time in a long time! Here it goes again! Is it as hard as you thought? Waiting on a fall? Forever! Forever! I swear I won’t write another song for you Forever! Oh, forever! Oh, forever!I swear I won’t write a song for you…

Libby’s Song

I’m feeling insane so I’ll try thoughts I hadn’t entertained in a while: “If everybody leaves, then the problem might be me...” Not sure what my place is in life... Thought about how it ends, maybe twice. Can’t think about it now—guess I’ll change my ways, somehow.... Not felt quite the same since that night. And the details rearrange, in their right. Lost yourself in me, I’ll refund the finder’s fee............ For taking away who we used to be.

Talking to Yourself

Don’t you love the way it feels now? To be talking to yourself? Know the hurt can be so real, how did you manage it yourself? I had memorized the ending long before i read the page. Know you can’t just keep pretending that this feeing wouldn’t fade. Woke up thinking it was here still, stuck myself in my old ways. Holding on to all that fear, still. Getting used to being brave.

Little Packages

We dropped ourselves off at the post office and paid all of our fares, sent them off in little packages. Mailed away our cares! We’re standing in the woods now and I’m smiling with these thoughts of you. They’re swirling round the playground where I made a laughing stock of you. Deep between our teeth, we were standing with bare feet and skin. Tongue in my cheek, I was hoping you would let me in. Then you saw everything that you wanted to and how I was there with you—shivering on my back before we ever knew this world would leave us, yeah one day it’ll fade away. But you’ll linger on and on and on and on and on, until I forget your name. who? In the kitchen, there’s a stove seeping gas into the dawn. I always leave the light on ‘cause I forget me when you’re gone…I forget me when you’re gone…. And in the morning we saw honeycomb on the walls, dipping into the ceiling where I chased down thoughts that fell from you, all your confused feelings. So, I hope you know how much I love you and how it feels––how does it feel? I hope I find love within myself, and I hope I.. what I find… I hope I find something real. I hope I find someone… that would be nice, that would be fun if I could find, find I’m someone.

Tiny Watch

I got a tiny watch on my wrist. I keep a tiny watch on that list of things i need to do. But I spend my days with you. Just like a spiderweb in the air, I thought i felt something. Was it there? Was our love all a lie? Well it’s why we said goodbye. If i could write you a song it’d go like this: There are times I think we missed out on. Baby, well those days are long gone. I got a letter I just can’t send. Thought I’d feel better, I guess it depends. And should you correspond.. Well I don’t think I’d move on. If I could write you a song it’d go like this: There are times I think we missed out on. Baby, well those days are long gone and I’m so glad that you are long gone.

Clear the Air

I’m not sure the last thing that you ever said to me was something very nice, now I think I’d ought to leave. You’re like an itch, but I’m in love. Yeah, I know you. You’ve had enough, you’ve had enough of me. I’m so lazy, I’m so bored, please engage me, life is short. Well there are several things I’d like to say to you so we can clear the air and I’ll finally try to move on. I’m really sorry that I used to get so drunk all of the time, yeah, I know that you probably hated that. I’m really sorry for a lot of things. I’m really sorry that I lost the ring that you bought me… You know I love love. I’m not so great at the relationship part of it. I’m not sure that anything will ever be the same. There’s something ‘bout the way that I can’t forget your name. I gave up hope that we would live life together. I loved you so but you’d had enough of me. I’m so crazy, I’m so sad, I don’t love you, it makes me mad. Well there are several things i’d ought to say to you so we can clear the air and i can finally try to move on. I’m really sorry, I’m really sorry, I’m really sorry, I’m really sorry. You know I love love. I’m not so great at the relationship part of it.

Candy Mountain Song

The day you left, I fell for you. Thought your dodging, dark eyes told the truth. Oh, how they watched all the nights go blue. You left, and I took a piece of you. So when you go, won’t you take a piece of me? Well I’m not sure if I’ll be ready to see you go, just take a piece of me. We sang big rock candy mountain songs, inside your arms where I belonged. I sure hope you don’t miss me when you’re gone, I hope I was never wrong. August is drawing near and I’m just glad to have you here. Go to sleep and know you took a piece of me.

Just like tears in heaven

Smoking that cosmo with Wanda, hangin’ out on the couch, we found an old film starred young Jane Fonda ‘cause we ran out of things we could talk about. I found our love letters, baby. I think about ‘em and laugh... I really thought love would save me, I don’t know why I thought that… Would you know my name if I saw you in heaven? Would it be the same? Or would it be just like heaven? Darling, I'll skip the train today. I wanna walk in the rain. I found my time is a currency, can’t spend it all in one place. Darling, look what love did to me! I think about what I lack! I fill the silence with empty things! I’ve lost time that I won’t get back! Would you know my name if I saw you in heaven? Would it be the same? Or would it be just like heaven? Would you know my name?

Reggae Song

I want a woman to lift me up against a wall and then proceed to feel me up. I want a woman. I don't care her name. She could be anybody, she just has to be gay. I want a woman to touch my thighs, who loves to sing and only smokes to get high. I want a woman to scream my name. She could be anybody, she just has to be gay. I want a woman crawling in my my bed, Oh, she confidently gives me real good head. And when I ask her if she has something to say, the only words I wanna hear are, “I am Gay!” Don’t wanna look for her in everyone I meet, don’t wanna hear myself admitting my defeat, out there’s a perfect woman, I’ll meet her one day. She don’t wanna ring, but she can cling, oh all the joy that she would bring, I want a woman and I’d like her to be gay. That’s the only thing, the only thing, I pray.

I said nothing

Called me late one night ‘cause I told you I’d be by your side when you needed me but there I go again, not answering. Maybe in the fall, we could run away, far from it all to another town, we’ll find some brand new things to bring us down. Saw it in your eyes: You were feeling sick and getting tired of the same old things and the words you said, they ring… And I said nothing, I just sat and stared at you. I said nothing, so scared it was the truth. I heard you’re killing time like you’ve got your own supply, I heard you’re getting fixed, Oh, I didn’t know it would come to this. Fingers in my hair, try to keep our minds from going there. When I heard the news, somebody screamed, somehow I knew. And I said nothing, I just sat and thought of you. I said nothing, knew the answer without proof. I said nothing, I just sat and thought of you. I said nothing, so scared it was the truth. So scared. It was the truth.

Fade out

I can see that you’re lying straight through your teeth. God bless you for trying to make a fool out of me. I hear what you’re saying, it's in the tone of your voice, always. It sounds like you’re complaining, you’re probably someone people try their best to avoid. I’m hoping that we fade out, I’m searching for a sign it will be okay. The way that things played out makes me think you knew that it would be this way! You could see I was lonely, I wear it on my sleeve. Don’t ask that you own me, wouldn’t really mind if you said you’d never leave. I’m hoping that we fade out, I’m searching for a sign it will be okay. The way that things played out makes me think you knew that it would be this way! This is not what I wanted, I’d said it before. I’d always been honest, using words you promised yourself you would ignore. I’m hoping that we fade out, I’m searching for a sign it will be okay. The way that things played out makes me think you knew that it would be this way!

Maze

In the middle, I’m lying, of a maze, that I just can’t figure out. I guess I should stop trying, take a walk in the best of–what’s about, not try to know what to say, not try to find out who’s leading the way, try not to fall back behind, try not to worry because I might not find what’s behind the door could be so much more, but for now I’m fine staying with you forever here, never to leave you behind. Not try to know what to say, not try to find out who’s leading the way, try not to fall back behind, try not to hurry like every day’s stealing my time. I’ll just hold out what I know then I’ll tell you how I feel. But you’re here and you’re gone, I guess it’s really no big deal… Is there some way that you could prove that anything you say is real? First you’re here then you’re gone, it’s you, that ain’t no big deal. I thought I was dreaming—till you said you had another soul to steal. Now I’m scared and lonely, thinking you might be the only one I can feel. I guess I should be quiet just in case what I tell you turns out wrong. But I think I might try it, just in case by tomorrow, it happens we’re gone.

I try

I don’t know why I try, I try, I try anymore! I don’t know why I try, I try, I try anymore! I don’t know why I try, I don’t know why I try! I don’t know why I try, I try, I try anymore! What do you think about seeing life through a rear view mirror? Doesn’t everything look clear? It’s so close but it's so far away. Objects may appear on a screen and everybody in their right minds thinks it’s normal now! I don’t know why I try, I try, I try anymore! I don’t know why I try, I try, I try anymore! I don’t know why I try, I don’t know why I try! I don’t know why I try, I try, I try anymore! I’ve have these books I’m stacking up onto a shelf– I can’t get enough! But I don’t plan to ever read them, no, I just think I like having things that collect dust but represent me and all the things that I wanna be but do I have the guts to be? I don’t know why I try, I try, I try anymore! I don’t know why I try, I try, I try anymore! I don’t know why I try, I don’t know why I try! I don’t know why I try, I try, I try, OH WOAH!

Playing Fair

Right now, she’s probably headed out Probably going to a party that she just found out about probably standing in a checkout line got a little box of red red wine. Right now, she’s showing up real late, probably blowing off the dude who thought she was a date, probably used him for the address there it’s nothing new, he probably knew and she’s just playing fair. Right now, she’s probably on the prowl, scope the room, oh I knew she won’t find the gal. Probably scoffing at the way things are chugging wine, dare to pine for the girl at the bar. Right now, there’s nothing left there to drink She’ll probably go back home Where at least she can think— Think about how she don’t have no one And sleep alone on her phone Thinking “what is love?”

On the Fence

Square images sit alone inside a frame while gears, usually grinding, finally move inside my brain and I can think again, and I’ve never thought so clear. But I’m alone again wishing you were near. Trying to escape but I don’t mind your name is written on every sign, on every bible I’ve never read and I can’t get you out my head. So I’ll wait for you, till the sun falls down to sleep I’ll wait for you till I fall asleep forever. I’ll wait for you. Some days I wake up, I might think that I was dead or wish I’m made up inside someone else’s head ‘cause I can’t breathe again and nothing’s ever clear, I’m on the fence again and don’t you dare come near. Trying to escape from my own mind. You’re coming back for more for me this time. And I’ll never blame you for what you did, And if I do, well, god forbid– If I care for you After all you put me through. If I’m missing you, If I needed you forever, Don’t make it true.

Welcome to the World

Don’t you worry if the sun is gonna shine. Don’t you listen to those voices in your mind. Think of cherry trees that rustle in the storm. Think of springtime as the earth begins to warm. Believe that yesterday is no longer alive, destroy tomorrow, it exists inside your mind; the now is all that matters, ignore the former & the latter. Darling dear, my little girl, welcome to the world. Lines get blurry, I distinguish day from night. Sleepless worrying, I toss and turn my mind. Cold scenario I can't seem to ignore, feeling manic, moving backward out the door. Something so simple grows a garden in my mind. All these vultures fly around me in the sky. I stand on a mountainside, I’m smaller than I realize. Darling dear, my little girl, welcome to the world. The dust will settle when you finally arrive. A rusty pedal spins around again, in time. Love is something that you’ll never go without. If you wonder what your life is all about: You’ll figure it out in your own, uncertain ways. God tries to speak to us in every given day. Just know I think of you, I think of dad & mommy too. Darling dear, my little girl, welcome to the world.

Tie Me down

So, why do you only beckon me when you’d like me to come find you? I'm not equipped to sink this ship, much less come to the rescue. I got my eyes checked & the doctor says they're lazy. I look around, it's only you. You've made my vision hazy. I've read about this love, it's written in the Bible. I feel it come like summer rain, smell it long before arrival. But why does this happen to me? Fall in & out of love with strangers so I'm always free. Tie me down, put my roots back in the ground. Tell me why all this time has passed us by. After painful attempts to just withdraw you I realized I never truly loved until I saw you. If you've heard my songs before, you'd know that love has used me. Taken all that it can get, abandoned & abused me. If you're gonna leave me, well, at least leave me a warning. I'll lace my shoes up good & tight, be gone before the mourning. But why does this happen to me? Fall in & out of love with strangers so I'm always free. Tie me down, put my roots back in the ground. Tell me why all this time has passed us by. After painful attempts to just withdraw you I realized I never truly loved until I saw you. Who are we in the fall, who are we & did we fall in love? Kiss me goodbye if that's your wish. It always boils down to this. Tie me down, put my roots back in the ground. Tell me why all this time has passed us by. After painful attempts to just withdraw you I realized I never truly loved until I saw you. I never truly loved until I saw you.

Two chords

Why can’t I write a song with two chords? It’s not like I’m trying to win some award. Don’t complicate it, don’t drag it out, don’t make your life what it ain’t about. It ain’t about– It ain’t about– It ain’t about– It ain’t about– It ain’t about what they say it is– Money and power, fame and shit. All of these things I can’t stand to know… The more I learn, well, the more I don’t… Wanna live… It’s come to this. It’s come to this. It’s come to this. It’s come to this. It’s come to this old and dried-up truth: I’m out here wasting my whole damn youth being so worried about these things that I can write about and then we all can sing! We all can sing! We all can sing! We all can sing! We all can sing, it comes at no cost. We sing to stay close to what we’ve lost. We sing to heal our tired souls, we sing to tell the world, the world of our woes. Woah! Woah! Woah! Woah!

Only feeling

There’s a rocky mountain high enough for me, I think. Yeah, the darkest of the nights are just another blink. I know it gets better... “She only left because I let her.” During open season, you could hear their beck & calls. There’s no other reason you would leave nothing at all. I know it’s not healthy, but it’s nice of you to help me. Hoping I could reach another part you never knew of yourself, I had to learn what I should never do. But I learned from the music, “If you got it kiddo, lose it.” There's a special place in hell for people just like me. I'm not lost or found, I'm stuck in my reality: there’s no opposite of lonely– it’s the feeling, that’s the only– it’s the feeling, that’s the only– feeling, that’s the only feeling, that’s the only feeling, that’s the only feeling, that’s the only feeling, that’s the only feeling.

all lyrics written by Wanda Wesolowski, except Lazy Susan written by Wanda Wesolowski and Aaron B. Anderson, Maze and Gotcha! written by Andrew Sharpe, and Just Like Tears in Heaven written by Wanda Wesolowski + Wyatt Thurman Poe III